So I’m taking it easy today in my backup burrough (Starbucks) and sipping a hot cappuccino with ZZ Top jamming in my earbuds (aardvarks love ZZ Top). Aardvarks have a rough life, right? I haven’t posted for a couple of weeks, so I thought I’d use my little claws and clack something out on the keyboard.
As usual, I’m writing stuff. I just put the finished touches on the seventh chapter of my latest novel. I’m going to have my #1 fangirl read over what I have to get some feedback. I also completed one new song and got a jump on another one earlier today! And of course, I’m sharing my genius on this blog today, so I’ve been a productive little critter!
RANT OF THE DAY: Why is that, on a perfectly clear, sunny day, you humans tend to drive in one of two categories: (1) slow than a chunky turtle or (2) faster than that stupid bird that goes “Beep! Beep!” all the time? I don’t think there is a third category named “Driving like ya got some sense”, based on my casual observation. Rant over.
In other news, I’ve done the unthinkable. Yes, that’s right: I’ve given up Peanut M&Ms. ‘Cause you all know aardvarks dig M&Ms, especially the peanut kind. The trouble is my waistline doesn’t dig them so much, especially when I’m buying pants (Wait! Aardvarks don’t wear pants, right?) I’m alwasy looking for ways to improve my physical health so I can be an even sexier ‘vark, and I realized I would grab a pack of those beauties almost every time I went into a grocery store, department store, etc. So they had to go. Condolences are being accepted at this time.
No changes on the “Looking For Mrs. ‘Vark” front. ‘Nuff said.
In more other news, a lot of the humans who call into my real job are … how shall I put this delicately … buttheads. Not that I’m bitter. I just hope a dung beetle makes a nest in their sock drawer. And breeds. Nothing dramatic.
“Sigh.”
This aardvark needs a vacation. Preferrably involving a Nickelback concert (aardvarks think Nickelback rules, as you well know). And perhaps an attractive female of the human species. You know … for biological studies and other intellectual pursuits.
And maybe some M&Ms. You know, the ones with the peanuts. Donations are now being accepted … just sayin’ …
The Naked Aardvark 